Saturday, October 13, 2007

Stoopid Hoomans! A Lesson in Siberians!

Dusty Doodles Reporting!!
My Da momma is really frustrated and so, I decided to help her. Da momma belongs to several email groups about us Siberians and it seems as though lots of peepole are joining these groups who have gotten a wee little Siberian and don't know the first thing about them. Da momma is frustrated becuz she joined these groups long, long before Doodles came here and she has always helped peepoles with their Siberians and other dogs. Now, that does not mean Da momma knows everything, becuz we all know that hoomans are stoopid, but she knows plenty about us Siberians and it takes us lots of thinking to pull something over on her. Seems she's on to all our tricks and ever some we haven't thought of yet!
So, Doodles is going to write the most frustrating things peepoles say that makes my Da momma scream. Doodles doesn't like that high pitched scream. Then Doodles will answer those questions hisself. Since other peepoles don't want to listen to Da momma, maybe they will listen to Doodles!!
My puppy just made a noise, it sounded like a 'wow', is he sick, is this normal?
That is called a woo and most all of us Siberians do that to try to communicate with you stoopid hoomans that can't seem to read tail, ear and lip language. Some Siberians say woo, some aroo, some roo, and some awrrooo. All are correct. It means different things at different times. I've been known to tell a whole woo story for 15 or 20 minutes. When Da momma tries to say woo, she always says the wrong thing and makes me mad, so it's best if you don't try to woo back at your pup.
My puppy is coming home tomorrow, he's 6 weeks old, help!!
You pup is too young to come to your house. He still needs his momma and brothers and sisters. See it's like this, pups need to learn about things like bite inhibition and when to play bitie and what it means when no one will play with you. Dog mommas teach us those things and much more. When a hooman takes us away from our dog mommas at 6 weeks, they are STOOPID!! Leave that pup where he is for at least another 3-4 weeks. Doodles didn't come to our house until he was 11 weeks old. Da momma thought that was the perfect age and I agree. I didn't miss my brothers and sisters, didn't cry all night, and had lots of fun. My signals to go potty were more recognizable to Da momma and the other hoomans and it was much easier to potty train me then it was with any other younger pup.
Help! My little pup has the runs and is vomiting!
Doh! Get off the computer, stoopid hooman and get that pup to the dog doctor. If you need Dr. Brenda's number look it up! Pups who are going out both ends are very sick and could die. Why are you wasting your time with a bunch of other stoopid hoomans?
I researched this breed, but no where did it say it would lose so much fur, there must be something wrong with my dog.
Wooo! You did not research SIBERIAN HUSKIES if you did not know we shed. We shed all year long and then twice a year we attempt to take over the world with our shedding -- that's called blow. See, what happens is we shed all our under furs and our guardy hairs and make big piles, the thought is that when we get enough fluff on the ground, we will all sneeze at once, all the Siberians all over the world, and it will blow up into a white cloud. During that white cloud blow up, the hoomans will be sneezing and rubbing their eyes and then quick, we will put Turbo in the White House (after which it will be called Turbo's House) and Siberian's will take over the world. It hasn't worked thus far becuz the stoopid hoomans got Dysons and cleaners and sucker things to suck up our fluff. BUT, we are working on a plan to grow bionic furs so it will break all those hooman machines. Meeshka has it about perfected now.
That's enough for today -- Da momma is right, these stoopid questions are frustrating!! If you have any questions about Siberians for Doodles, send them and I'll answer more questions next time!
Doodles Out!!


Sadie Mae said...

Hey Doodles! I updated my blog. Go read it, since you wanted me to update it for so long.

-Sadie Mae Dog

Tucker said...

Wow! It sounds like Da momma needs to join different groups! I was lucky that the Human Assistant was in a very good group when I arrived.

Some doggies are just unlucky in what people they get. :-(

Raisa Husky said...

Hahaha! Great post!
The plan of using the furs to put Turbo in the White House is really clever!!!
In Brazil, we have been using our furs to make "Husky snow": the ground gets white and we pretend we are in Alaska. Humm... But the idea of using furs to take power sounds much cleverer!!!

Shmoo said...

Your human woman is very smart. My human woman has been ignoring that group for about a month because part of her brain leaked out of her head, and take it from me, she doesn't have much more to leak out.

She says she'll start reading it again, now that she's got some more brain fluid built up.


Holly said...

My human woman is on the same group, cuz she remmbers reading some of those! She was very surprised at the "wow" and the fur questions. Hello, Siberian Husky, LOTS of FUR, and VERY talkative. Just look at Samuel, he NEVER shuts up! Fur has become not only a wardrobe essential here, but also a food group!


Steve, Kat, & Wilbur said...

Hey Dusty. You are so smart. We are the first huskies for our parents but they read a lot of books about us before they got us. I think they should have just asked you for advice though! They did one thing wrong though. They got us at six weeks. Mom says she understands now why that's a bad idea but she thinks we did better because we still had each other instead of being completely alone. However, both Mom and Dad just want to adopt a rescue next time that isn't a puppy. I don't know why. Something about all the pottying and stuff. Weird.


A&S said...

we really like the idea of the turbo's house!
and good advice doodles! you should start a column or something....dear doodles...

Amici said...

Frustrating indeed! We are first time lovers of our pup, siberian husky, but like Kat & Steve we read up on them galore before we got one. I wonder what those people say about the exercise part....

Mindy said...

I randomly found this when I was googling "Siberian Husky talk". I am a stupid human who rescued a sibe that was about to be gassed to death at a shelter. She's a great dog...

I read up as much as I could. However, I am still confused about the talking. She woo's when I let her out of her bedroom in the morning. She woo's when she sees the leash. She woo's when she wants attention. She woo's at the other dogs--a basset and a docile puppy.

That's my question--I was told by the vet to keep her separated for a while (she was extremely stressed). Now I let her smell the basset and she woo's and nips and gets very alert when the basset moves. Is this prey mode or play mode??

This stoopid human could really use some help. We're good except I don't know what the wooing exactly means???



Doggy Dish said...

Hey Doodles! I have read many blogs from passionate animal lovers, but the posts about your PUPPIES are some of the best!

shane said...

hey doodles, your blog was great! i enjoy reading it! keep it up 2 thumbs up for you! :D

Dog Fence