Wednesday, March 21, 2007

The Incredible Shrinking Doodles!

Dusty Doodles Reporting!

Diets suck. Diets are stoopid. Doodles doesn't like diets. Do you know that I hardly get any foods and only green beanies for desert?? Once a day those stoopid hoomans give me A cookie. That's right, ONE cookie. That is stoopid. I have been eating more olives then ever trying to get my tummy filled up. Da momma thinks they might not be on my diet and so before she finds out, my goal is to eat them all up. I have 2 olive trees in my pen -- that's a lot of olives!!

Doodles has tried reasoning with the hoomans, but they don't understand huskytalk. I woo and they woo back, but their woo's are stoopid stuff. I'll say something like, "Doodles has been really good, how about a cookie please" and when they woo back, they say "The sun is dark tonight". It just really makes no sense and I am sick of it. Doodles is thinking I will run away to some other husky's house, some place they have cookies and bones and good stuffs.

Now SadieMae, my cousin, is threatening to come and visit and eat all my cookies!! That is totally not fair and Doodles doesn't like it. Whiskey makes fun of me and makes my fluffies jiggle and then she laughs as me.

Meanwhile, Da momma says she thinks I am less jiggly tonight and Doodles say that he is shrinking and shrinking and pretty soon, if he doesn't get some cookies or more foods, he is just gonna up and shrink away and be gone.

I think I'm going to Kansas. I hear good things about Kansas and I bet they have lots of cookies there.

Doodles Out!

Thursday, March 15, 2007

Dr. Brenda

Dusty Doodles Reporting!

So, Doodles had to go to Dr. Brenda for my checkup and my shots. We had to take Whiskey, cuz she's a wussy dog and can't stay by herself yet. That was okay, cuz she didn't get to see Dr. Brenda, she had to sit in the waiting room.

So we gets there, oh Da momma made Da dad put the cold air thing on in the car so Doodles wouldn't get to hot. But any ways, we gets there and it was very sad. There was another dog there that Dr. Brenda was sending to The Bridge, so Doodles had to wait a very long time for his hoomans to say good bye to him.

Finally Linda, my favorite nursie, told Da momma to get me on the scale. That was no fun. See, I knew I had gained a couple of fluffies since my last visit, cuz you know, I have to help Whiskey eat her cookies and Doodles has to have his Otter Pops and stuff. Well, Da momma nearly fell over and told Nursie Linda to check the scale and re-weigh me. I don't know what it said, but it was a lot of fluffies.

Then a new girl came over to steal my blood right there in the waiting room. Remember the other dog was going to The Bridge in the examination room, so I couldn't go in there. This new girl stuck my leg 3 times. YES THREE TIMES and no blood would come out. I woo'd and told them that I gave at the office, but they didn't believe Doodles. So then, Da momma says ENOUGH -- and told them to get the clippers. See with my winter fluffies the new girl couldn't find my bloods. I think she was stoopid. Anyway Nursie Linda agreed with Da momma and made the new girl get the clippers. THEN THEY STOLE MY FURS!!! A whole big patch of my furs!! But then the new girl was able to steal my bloods. They needed it for my bloods tests. I heards them tell Da momma that they was normals.

Finally, after like forever, Dr. Brenda comes out -- she sent the other dog to The Bridge -- and told Da Momma that she could bring me back to the Treatment room for my exam. Dr. Brenda checked me out real good and I kissed her and then woo'd in her ear. I was telling her a secret. She can't tell you because of doctor patient confidentiality. But, get this, she told Da momma's that I had the JIGGLES!!!! See I have so much fur that she couldn't feel the extra fluffies on me, but she JIGGLED me and Doodles JIGGLED really bad. Da momma was all upset and said that word. You know that word -- 'obese'. Dr. Brenda said Doodles wasn't 'obese', but I was 'chunky'. I liked that word. UNTIL she said the next word which was DIET!!! Da momma agreed with her and said she would put Doodles on a DIET!!! And then Da momma told me no more cookies and no more Otter Pops. YES, you read that right -- NO cookies and NO Otter Pops for Doodles. Dr. Brenda said Doodles has to lose 10 lbs. Now, Doodles doesn't know how much fluffies 10 lbs equates to -- but it sounds horrible!! AND NO COOKIES!!!

Da momma talked to Dr. Brenda for a while longer, but I don't remember what they said cuz I was in SHOCK!!! NO COOKIES!!!! NO OTTER POPS!!!!

As we were leaving Dr. Brenda and then Nursie Linda both gave me a cookie and that was good. But Da momma told me to enjoy them cuz there'd be no more for a long time! NO COOKIES!!!!

When we gots home it was time for dinner and Da dad didn't give me all my foods. He said it was cuz of the diet. Doodles doesn't like this diet thing and I want it to go away. NO COOKIES!!! AND I don't get all my foods. How fair is that???

It's been a couple of days now and I'm still not getting all my foods and I haven't had not even one cookie. Da momma felt sorry for me and gave me some greenie beanies though and I like those -- but not as well as cookies.

That's it for now.

Doodles Out!!

Sunday, March 04, 2007

Doodles is Sad and Mad

Dusty Doodles reporting!

I am so sorry I have not updated my blog before now, but Doodles has been busy and sad and mad and I didn't realize it had been so long. So Everyhusky, Everydog and FuFu, please forgive Doodles and he will try to be better and post a report every week.

So, where does Doodles begin?? Well, we gots rain and more rains, finally the rains came. Doodles was just making my muddy holes really good, when Da dad came with MORE straw! Now, those hoomans already brought the straw in for the winter and Doodles had it all distributed just right, so I had dry spots and muddy holes. Those stoopid hoomans thought Doodles and Whiskey looked too muddy and brought in more straw. Let me ask you Everyhusky, can you ever look too muddy?? See Doodles didn't think so either, so it made Doodles very mad. No kisses for Da dad or Da mom.

Then, the rain stopped. And now Doodles has all this straw and no rain to soften it up and make it eatible. Hoomans are so stoopid. Da momma says it's gonna rain in a few days, but Doodles isn't so sure.

Then, get this -- this made Doodles so sad. Da momma and Da dad got these big hooman men to come and they stole our comfy couch that wrapped around the whole room. Our couch was very comfy and it would fit all of us on it, plus the hoomans too. It's gone. They stoled it and put it in a big truck and took it away. Doodles watched them do it. No more big, comfy, wrap around the whole room couch. Those same big men guys brought into our house this little dinky couch thing and these cliner chair, as Da dad calls it. This couch is pretty comfy, but not at comfy as our old one and if Whiskey and Doodle both lays on it, there is no room for Da momma. Now what fun is that?? I need Da momma for my pillow and to give belly rubs when I turn upside down. There's no room for her if Whiskey in lounging too?? AND they are being real protective of the new couch. They have it covered in blankies, which is nice, but still, Doodles would like to sniff the real thing and not our old blankets. AND Doodles has been having to sleep in his crate, cuz Da dad says he can't trust me after they found the bite that Whiskey took out of their bed sheet things. Yup, you read that right, Whiskey took a bite out of the flannel, softie sheet things on the big bed and Doodles gets blamed for it!!! So now Doodles has to sleep in the crate instead of on the couch. What's wrong with that picture?? Sure, Whiskey has always slept in her crate since she first came her, but she's a dumb girl and girls don't know how to act right. But Doodles hasn't had to sleep in his crate, except for when Da dad was sick, since he was a puppy. Doodles is a big dog now, not a puppy and this isn't right. I think I might have to employ Meeshka and her legal stuff to do a number on my humans. I swear, I didn't take a bite out of those sheetie things and Doodles needs to sleep on the couch, even if it's not the comfy wrap around couch.

Doodles is so mad and then sad too, cuz we lost that good couch and those big guys stoled it and now all we's got is the dinky couch that I can't sleep on.

Well that's all I gots for today, I promise to update more often and let you know about my friends.

Doodles out!